is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize