your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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