It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Randomize
