would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
