Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
try to milk me bitch
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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