so that wasnt chicken after all
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Rumble strips road head = magical
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
