I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
