even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
