yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
