so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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