David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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