Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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