I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
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