okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
