Having a random hookup so left but love u
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
