She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
