you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Houston, we have a blender
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
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