My entire life is one complicated drinking game
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Panties = found
Randomize