Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
