Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I have fence marks all over my body
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
