Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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