just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
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