Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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