He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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