Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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