i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
