so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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