Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
