You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
