What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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