i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
i think im in europe. pls send help
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize