just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
pray to the hookup gods
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
