Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize