i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
i want to fuck
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it's pretty self explanatory
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
