yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
