Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
