so explain again why im purple
no
I think I won the penis lottery.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
