Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
