Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
