I must be too annoying 4 u.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
We're too hungover to prance.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
