i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
