yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
