My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
