She's JV to your varsity
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Randomize
