He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
