i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
nutella sex= disaster
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
