Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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