Don't you send me to vm
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
