operation have a gay friend backfired
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
