i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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