My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
