My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
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