Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
