i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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