Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Let the clothes fall where they may.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
